It’s not fair that I have to be so far away. It’s not fair that I can’t help even when I want to. It’s not fair that her mind is going while I’m so far and can’t be there to see her or talk to her when she’s still “there” so she’ll at least know me. Right now, she’s not so far. But how quickly will it progress, how bad will she get? Will anyone really know? She wants to be independent, but how independent is she? According to an ER doctor, she can’t be. She needs help. Why can’t she be the woman who makes me itchy clothes, and has a biting wit that either made you roll your eyes or laugh? Why can’t she be the strong woman from when I was young? Why do I have to be so far?
And I can’t be there.
This is the worst part of the Foreign Service.